August: The Practice of Rigorous Honesty

Rigorous honesty is the practice of being completely truthful with ourselves and others—not simply avoiding lies, but being willing to look honestly at our thoughts, choices, behaviors, motives, and patterns, even when doing so is uncomfortable.

There is something about August that feels like a threshold.

Summer is still very much with us, yet there are subtle reminders that another season is approaching. The days begin to shorten. Schedules start to return. We begin thinking about what comes next.

It can also be a meaningful time to look inward.

Not with criticism. Not with judgment. But with honesty.

What Does Rigorous Honesty Really Mean?

Rigorous honesty asks us to go beyond simply telling the truth.

It asks us to stop avoiding the truths we already know.

Sometimes the most difficult person to be honest with is ourselves.

We can become very good at explaining away the things that aren't working. We tell ourselves we're too busy. We convince ourselves something doesn't bother us when it does. We remain committed to habits, relationships, expectations, or versions of ourselves that perhaps no longer fit.

Rigorous honesty asks us to become quiet enough to notice.

What am I avoiding?

Where am I making excuses?

What am I holding onto simply because it is familiar?

Where do my choices no longer reflect the person I want to be?

These aren't questions meant to make us feel badly about ourselves. They're invitations to become more aware.

Honesty Requires Courage

There is a difference between being hard on ourselves and being honest with ourselves.

Being hard on ourselves says, I should have done better.

Honesty asks, What can I learn from this?

Being hard on ourselves keeps us focused on regret.

Honesty allows us to acknowledge what happened and decide what we want to do differently moving forward.

That kind of honesty requires courage because sometimes growth begins with admitting something we would rather not admit.

Maybe we're exhausted because we haven't created boundaries.

Maybe we're resentful because we've repeatedly said yes when we wanted to say no.

Maybe we're constantly distracted because we've become uncomfortable with stillness.

Maybe we're holding onto something because we're afraid of what happens if we let it go.

We don't have to have everything figured out before we acknowledge what is true.

God Already Knows Our Hearts

Faith has taught me that honesty doesn't require perfection.

God already knows our hearts.

There is tremendous freedom in remembering that.

We don't have to pretend. We don't have to have the perfect answer or the perfect plan. We simply have to be willing to become more truthful—with God, with ourselves, and with the way we are living our lives.

Sometimes that truth leads us toward change.

Sometimes it leads us toward forgiveness.

Sometimes it tells us to rest.

Sometimes it asks us to begin again.

Creating Space to Hear Yourself

Rigorous honesty is difficult when our lives are constantly filled with noise.

Phones. Notifications. Emails. Social media. Television. Other people's opinions.

When every quiet moment is immediately filled, we rarely give ourselves enough space to recognize what we're actually thinking or feeling.

This is one of the reasons I continue to believe so strongly in the importance of unplugging.

Put the phone down.

Take a walk.

Sit outside.

Breathe.

Pray.

Journal.

Have a conversation without a screen sitting between you.

Unplug to reconnect.

Sometimes the clarity we're searching for isn't found by adding something else to our lives. It comes when we remove enough noise to hear what has been there all along.

An August Invitation

As we move through the final weeks of summer, perhaps August can be less about reinventing ourselves and more about becoming honest about what we already know.

Ask yourself:

What is one truth I have been avoiding?

You don't have to solve it today.

Simply acknowledge it.

Because awareness creates choice. And choice gives us the opportunity to move forward differently.

There is strength in honesty.

There is freedom in truth.

And there is grace in knowing that we can always begin again.

Keep the Faith,

Katie Hoban